Thought for the day – money, honey…

“When you encounter difficulties and contradictions, do not try to break them, but bend down with gentleness and time.”

anon

Doesn’t this, in fact, call for patience? Patience, widely said is to be a virtue, and I would agree undoubtedly, for its opposite may in fact be anger… as impatience results in an angry mode of being or behavior. These are not pretty things to talk about.. But life is of many shades, patterns and hues, and if we strive for good, we are bound to be sometimes opposed, or have obstructions in our way. What to do?

When we are looking at ourselves, where in fact we must, as change begins with ourselves, we cant expect change to come from others… We must also be patient.

I discovered this after returning home from my first time living overseas. That was a few years ago, now, as I toed and fro-ed a little.. I was on a “high”, I guess we could say – as in I had learned a foreign language, made many new friends, challenged myself in work, and creatively or artistically, by taking up oil painting, photography and serious yoga studies.. I had learnt already how “stupid” I thought I was, had realized many inefficiencies and areas for growth, had been continuously humbled, by learning a new language and relating with foreign peoples, and yet still, when I returned home I was then to maybe just have a “taste” of what it is to be a foreigner again, but in my own country.

Things change, technology changes, the cities grow. What was acceptable or trendy in job-hunting a couple of years ago is now different… That was my expereince, then, anyway.

I think now, fortunately, given the financial crisis, maybe we are becoming (at least for a while), somewhat more ‘real’ when it comes to just about everything. Pretentiousness is not so cool in a stressed economic climate, and the basics of life are acknowledged as such. Or, at least, this is how I see it.

I am impressed with the Australian nature in that I think overall we are a down-to-earth bunch, that is to say, we may like luxuries, but our happiness is by no means dependent upon them, and furthermore we are flexible and adaptable by nature, also. When the crisis hit, most steered clear of the shopping centres, and took a sensible approach to spending. Since the media hype has dulled down and we have accepted the facts that the economy is not what it was, people are out and about again, it’s not say that people will overspend as they did beofre, but it hasnt dampened our lust for life at all.

That is something which I had initially missed about Spain, and living in a region where quality of life was prized more than wages, ie. lifestyle compensated for huge earnings. On the Costa del Sol, shall I say more specially Malaga and Marbella, it’s all about lifestyle. People work to live, and not the other way round.

For instance, with great company, one could enjoy the humblest of meals, say sardines roasted on the beach, eaten on plastic chairs with sand underfoot, and on a shared plate, or a simple glass of wine with a small plate of olives, but it would become a luxurious treat, even an extravaganza, even if your lunch was a basic mixed salad, and your afternoon was to stroll though a hillside town, or lay on the beach with a friend or partner… simply by enjoyment – appreciation of the setting, the passers by, the weather, the environment…It was never necessary to spend loads of money to have a good time..

Australia may have once been more like this? We have been misguided, and conditioned to believe that money equates with happiness, and success. I can assure you that, having lived both spectrums – of wealth, and indeed not so wealthy, money can cause more problems than it is worth.

Money is a bit like honey. It’s sweet, it tastes good, and adds good flavor to common things; usual things, such as tea, cereal – whatever you enjoy honey with, maybe toast, yoghurt sweetening the blandest and most economical bowl of porridge… But in the end, if you leave the honey jar open, it attracts flies.

Or ants, or bugs, and in the worst cases, rats.

Money turns the most genuine of souls evil, or it would at least seem that way. I’m not going to get into particular politics here, or personal vendetta… It is not the place for such thing, but I will maintain, that I have seen people, or relationships destroyed by money, or the misuse thereof.

People say money is power. Money is power, until it is misused, and then it has disempowered you.

I saw people with addictions, who couldn’t afford to pay their bills, their coffee, even, and would leave tabs every where they went. Yet they never ‘fessed up to it’ rather, pretending it was someone else’s fault, that their ex-wife, for instance, had blown all their money on their alcoholism, or simply woudn’t justify where there money had suddenly disappeared to.

I feel very sad in my heart for these people, as I know that the sweetness of honey has become a sharp sting rather like a bee sting for them.

That they will eventually be left alone with the realization that their addictions, be it drugs or alcohol, (including cigarettes) or all three, are responsible for their sadness, and they are crippled, as they have been denying their reality for so long.

Some people’s addictions are so insidious that they hide their addiction to money under the guise of the stockmarket. If and when the person is untrained, it is no dissimilar to gambling. They are literally ‘playing with fire’. Other addictions related include pornography. I have known individuals who harbor these tendencies, and make no apologies for their mistakes, but rather choose to blame the outside world for their own inadequacies.

I was victim once or twice to relationship which brought me down to my knees, wondering where the justice was, but I never pointed the finger. Rather, I walked.

This is the tip of the iceberg, from my own experiences, but I share them, as I know I am not alone in having dealt with these abuses of power, and I freely extricate myself, never – to return to such indignities.

I dont speak here of the worst of it – as I don’t believe the forum is truly fitting to bear the the most frank of explanations.

For, water flows under the bridge and I have a deep understanding, having lost my father, and also having my inheritance misused by someone who failed miserably in respecting me and my highest wishes, that indeed,, In the end, you “can’t take it with you” ie. money.

Life, rather is about sharing, if nothing else, one of my favorite sayings, long of the past was ‘sharing doubles the fun/joy”, and I truly think it does.

But “sharing” is never by coercion, manipulation, or control. Sharing comes from the heart, as opposed to the ego.

So, it is with these words, I wish all well, those who have lied, those who have told tales, and those who have neglected to tell the truth, or have molded it, bended it, or even fabricated it.

For it is with freedom that one celebrates one’s authentic path and with a lighter weight even if their boots were muddied along the way, their stilettos got damaged, or their trainers got a little less plump underfoot.

Stories don’t require extrapolation, for indeed – “A wise man [or woman] hears one word, and understands two” .
– Yiddish proverb.

And for now, given it’s that time of the year – end of financial year (that is) approaching, I just thought back collating data from some years behind, and wanted to voice if ever so mildly some water that had passed under my bridge, if I didn’t maybe noone would ever know..

I’ll finish with; such a beautiful phrase;

“A man there was, They called him mad… The more he gave, The more he had.” John Bunyan

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~ by Teena Davidson on June 30, 2009.

2 Responses to “Thought for the day – money, honey…”

  1. Well spoken.. a humble appraisal of what is truly meaningful in life.. cheers

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